hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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