I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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