You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
