Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She told me I should be a condom model.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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