were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize