Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
My balls are so social today.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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