...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
