so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
