Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
