I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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