weddingsv make me drug and hornr
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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