Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
