***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
