it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
