just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize