Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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