Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize