I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
