you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
