So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Randomize
