that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
