Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
well, you know. whores of a feather.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
