Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
