How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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