Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
