that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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