we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize