oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
tell your sister to shave her snatch
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
