We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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