Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I think im going to throw up on grandma
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Randomize
