I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
