Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
