Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
