I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
