Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
