Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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