Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
