I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
