I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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