Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
