i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
