Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
