Don't you send me to vm
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
