hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
