arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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