im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Slut skills are useful in every country.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
