How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
her vagine was all disorganized.
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Randomize
