who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
