I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
