But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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