what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Your cock deserves a montage
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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